Journalled on Thursday, 23rd of March 2023 | Copacabana, Rio de Janeiro: 28 degrees, hot, sunny and slightly cloudy.
Just a typical day. Exercise in the morning, classes all day and Yasmin in the evening. Well, it wasn’t so normal.
The exercise was regular. The classes were mostly normal. However, some classes were cancelled for some reason, and I consequently felt a wave of laziness and tiredness.
I do not consider myself lazy. When it comes to my responsibilities and commitments, I am focused and disciplined. I attend all my classes without fail and fulfil my obligations as Yasmin’s father with the utmost attention and care.
I make sure to honour my commitments and do everything I need to do.
I have realised that I lack the necessary commitment to make positive changes in my life. I feel like I need a final push to start a new chapter, but the idea of it scares me. Many people are surprised that I am not as successful as I should be, given my skills, capacity, and intelligence.
I should be in a better financial situation, but something has always held me back. I now know the barrier stopping me from achieving my goals is myself.
My fear of success comes from my childhood experiences. My mother would repeatedly tell me that I was not good at anything, and this subconscious message has stayed with me throughout my life until now. However, I am now working to shed this negative mindset and find the right path forward without carrying such a heavy load for so long.
I am 56 years old and feel that if I don’t act now, I never will. I have spent more than a year studying and preparing myself for this time. It’s time for me to step forward and make a change in my life.
I am not concerned with the rewards that may come my way; instead, I am focused on the journey itself, the challenges I will face, and the accomplishments ahead. I am ready to take on whatever comes my way and am grateful for this opportunity.
As for the classes that were cancelled at the end of the day, I went downstairs to the street and found Yasmin working out on the beach. When I arrived, she hadn’t finished her series yet, so I kept listening to music for a while.
I’m currently listening to a lot of The Avener, Talk Talk, and the Swedish group Sigur Rós. I really like the soulful touch in their music. After finishing, Yasmin and I walked back along the bustling calçadão (promenade) and picked up some açai on the way.
In bed by 9 p.m.
Thank you.
Thanks for reading my blog. Check out my other posts and share your thoughts in the comments.
Richard
